A beginning of a write… – a poem by Stuart Crossley – All Poetry

https://allpoetry.com/poem/14444859-A-beginning-of-a-write…–by-Stuart-Crossley

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The beginnings of a work of the mind of a ‘deluded’ one (?)

I.

‘…the opening of consciousness is the process so as to open the mind;was that even worded in the correct way?

Is that even a necessary component for that which I wish to express?

Is this musing finished,or is it merely just the beginning of self exploration and contemplation?

I hear you say ‘of course it is’ and you would be in right to comment thus.

I am merely scratching at the surface,there is so much more [upon closer inspection] than that which presents itself to my conscious mind.

On a different matter (which I suppose relates to my line of thought) I have said this before,but from my observation,the majority of society is so full of their own self importance. It’s as if (in their mentality) ‘no one exists apart from me.’

That which I mentioned above [if my observations are correct]is a very sad reflection of the world at large.

I may have reiterated my own words,It is not my wish to sound monotonous,but so as to highlight how pressing a matter this is.

I do not wish to sound pretentious or patronizing,I am simply stating the facts.

So as to return to the original subject,the soul (it would seem) is beyond comprehension on a personal level (an analysis of the individual level of the individual in question) from the observer’s point of view.

The attempt to peer into the individual and how their inner workings are constructed on an ontic level.

If this does not appear to be the case (although many claim that they can do so)surely more accurate examples can be attained by studying groups,or several,for that matter,then scaled down to an individual (?)

This seems to be much more complex,after all,we can never know how close we are,or we may be correct in our analysis (analyses).

That be well known information,but bear with me.From the Psychological point of view there have been countless studies of human behaviour,both in groups and of an individual.

I am not saying that I know more than I do,I have no wish to do so.

It is merely my wish to put forth on paper how I see things and that is all.

May I make this clearer or expand on this further,if you like?

I think it should up to the individual reader to reach their own conclusions.

Has a complete idea or ideas arrived at yet?

The reason for this (I think anyway) is that new ideas are presented (in whatever subject you wish) which then uncover more.

As the majority of human kind seems to be inquisitive by nature,many people search for years (in themselves,nature,ect.)

That ‘aha’ moment seems to evade us (or so we think) ,that is until that discovery is made.

A revelatory experience,and in that moment so much is discovered about the subject of study ,and in that moment too so are many discoveries about the self brought to the forefront of awareness.

As a sidestep (as I am prone to so,or so I’m told ) ,call it a migration of thought,if you like,at times which seem an appropriate time to stop conversing on a particular subject,like a full stop I suppose.

By what I mean to communicate by that which I have just written,is an examination of how we as humans at times have compulsions and feelings of a need to act at whim.

An escapism from the ‘rules’ imposed upon us by societal norms,not acting in accordance with our true nature,as opposed to us acting on whim,which gives us that time of freedom which we all long for,as that is the moment of liberation from the ‘hum drum’ of our lives.

Am I right in thinking that this chapter should be concluded?Have we reach a correct moment to cease our thoughts? Is it the the thoughts of the reader that this chapter should reach its natural end ,to be continued in the next chapter? This is to be continued,I guess…’

II.

…So here we are again,if you have read this far,I must be saying something right,I feel I should thank everyone who even read a sentence of mine,that is indeed a great compliment (I mean that sincerely,I assure you.)

To understand another (and for them to do the same also)it is fundamental not to make snap judgements based on a fragment of information. The true meaning can only be understood by the knowledge ,on a holistic viewpoint,of every aspect of the matter in question.

What is written above are simply a set of rules that can be applied to any situation you so wish.

That which I am writing I am sure is just common sense,I was just prompting the reader so as to put into action (if they do not already) the principal I have pointed out if they wish to do so.

It was made clear to me only recently,that there is always the possibility that what we say ,or by whatsoever means we wish to communicate,is so often misconstrued.

Then ,it seems would be the case,the intention has to be explained so that the line of thought (of the speaker)is accurately portrayed in the listeners mind.

Then (often be the case) that the speaker or listener has to elaborate on how valid,to the situation at hand,their point is.

They may be right in what they say or not so,but that is not the point.

The point is at (ideally) that moment ,they discuss their individual takes on the matter at hand and so reach (hopefully) a rational conclusion to both of their veiwpoints,which they both may be surprised at.

This could of course be mulled upon,then the conversation can be approved with an open mind with the aim to listen to the others viewpoint.

One may not agree,but if the other is right,how can that fact not be conceded to?

Honesty begins with the self,and to admit flaws (as you may guess this is an analogy [I’m fond of those] ) is the mark of the truest strength.

And so that leads nicely into morality,a subject which I am sure heavily weighs upon the vast majority of peoples minds. If someone were to stop and think about it (they may consider themselves not capable of deep thought,but,is that really the case?)
they may discover far more than they ever knew beforehand,in fact they may find that they quite surprise themselves!

To sit (or lay) in a place of solitude,or in deep meditation ,if you prefer.

There is nothing but silence,only natural sounds.In short nothing to distract your thoughts.

Just ‘being’ tends to work best for me,the answer (to whatever the issue is.) just ‘presents’ itself to your mind!

Then it is all so clear what the answer is. If you prefer apply the same setting to just take the time to think with no distractions.

See?You knew the answer all along,all you needed was space and to take time for yourself,so then you could be who you are ,not how people ‘tell’ you to be.

We all like to think were in control,am I right?

Well what if I were to tell you that that isn’t the case.We are all dulled down by the ‘powers that be’ if you like. The media,television,music,ect.Is all filtered for those who are not ‘awake’ enough to even know they are being controlled.

Those who are (like yourselves for reading this,for example) are able and aware of the aforementioned fact,can make a conscious decision if you want to, to listen,watch,buy,read ,ect.that which is popular,or you can choose otherwise ,look into what’s available (hidden,if you like) and so you are able to make up your own mind.

Let’s take rock music as an example. After many years of listening to it,few bands/artists are popular compared with how many there actually are,most is either underground or on specific radio stations.

Why do you think that is? That which I stated above regarding control says it all ,I think.

I could go on,but I fear I may sound conspiratorial,which I am not by the way.

I ask ,if you choose to ,to take a moment to mull that over,may I state that this is only if you want to ,so you may decide for yourselves how that makes you feel.

Am I correct (or am I being presumptuous?) in by my thinking that you would not have read that unless we had a similar mind set?

III.

I really should (I feel ) extrapolate on the subject of morality,as I fear I was not clear,too vague in that which I wrote in regards to this subject.

I merely ran into one method (which,I may add,is one I employ) of attaining that feeling towards others,an empathy is built by sticking to meditational principles.

But where does that come from in the first place? Many have vocalised their opinions on the matter,it is my wish to do the same also.

Please listen,or read (seeing as this is typed) if you will,on my views concerning the matter.

It would seem to me that the feeling of respect towards others is down to the individual,how they react to external circumstances are affected by how they have already been ‘moulded ‘ at a very young age.

When someone is always doing wrong ,constantly being disrespectful,ect. the reaction of others is always ‘I blame the Parents ‘ I personally think that is true,in my opinion society comes second.

The major principles of however one conducts themselves in this world begins with the Parents.

True,there is all this teenage angst stuff,but deep down (even in our worst times) there are things we would never say,things we would never do ,for example,we could be in the worst company,but someone who has true morality will act according to their principles.

Those principles I may add ,as if I had to,are imbued in us by our Parents and their Parents.

Obviously we all have weaknesses ,I certainly do,but nothing can dispute who we are at the core of our being.

Why,for example,have I chosen to write this in an almost stanza like format?

I honestly don’t know the answer,but it didn’t hurt anyone did it?

Do you see the way I am using that as a comparison? (by analogy as usual)

People may not like the style,but did anyone come to great harm as a result?

I guess this was all due to my personal sense of morality.

Thinking about it,before I go any further we are going full circle,if a positive attitude is within us,how can the negative control?

I’m sure you know the answer,so why is it the world has become as negative as it is?

It all boils down to the fact that those who are in control do not wish to share their wealth with those that they oppress.

The truth is that they are scared,scared of you,if you refuse to become one of the ‘mindless lemmings’ ,you have far more power than they can ever have.

IV.
… Random thoughts or many may occur to the internal thought processes of us all as individuals,as I expect you all have experience of when we have a moment of ‘enlightenment’ ,I use brackets for a reason,please read on,if you would be so kind,I shall be glad to explain.

Thoughts that seem of the greatest importance (at the time ) ,and so are those thoughts merely fleeting,when we go to write them several hours later,that exact moment is gone ,and so is the thoughts,feelings,ect.

What I am getting at is on a similar point to that which we have already discussed.

In a period of time,what is written then (painted,carved,ect.) has a seperate meaning than that which is (in a misguided way) lost in translation in order to be read in current times.

True some works seem timeless,yet from generation to generation there are minor alterations to the original work.

Needless to say the changes are more noticeable the further apart the age gap.

Yet if the work is written (or whatever various art forms require) with effectiveness ,the discrepancies can be overlooked as the essence,the intended feelings,ect. are still evoked in the readers mind,even if they never read (or in whatever way is needed to contemplate the work) the original,for it is now in a format palatable to them.

~
I started this work with such enthusiasm,and yet that now seems to have dissipated.

This brings forth emotions that become blocked,if you like,they are not in fact so,for creativity is always present,all one has to do is find the correct ‘tool’ to access it.

This is [obviously] harder to do in practice than I just made it appear.

But,I ask you,is that truly the case ? I think that I have just demonstrated that [the truth of this matter]just by writing thoughts ,you may arrive at a destination you never even thought of before.

This may apply to a subject that you thought you knew your emotional viewpoint on.

One way that one explores a subject on a level deeper than what was known before,is when one is unable to sleep or stays up on purpose.

We are going full circle about that which I mentioned before. To be alone with ones own thoughts,allows one the freedom from background thoughts (which oppress us more than we think) ,this may sound an obvious thing to say,but to truly experience that feeling is far beyond words alone.

~
On a different matter (I do hope,as I am writing this quite randomly) inner turmoil is thought to control us yet is it not our own individual consciousness that causes it to be? -There have been numerous writings on this subject and I expect many who have read (or by whatsoever media is so used)

It is indeed a subject that cannot be answered or even contemplated upon without deep thought on the subject at hand.

That may seem an obvious statement to many ,but I intend to make myself as clear as possible to the reader.

Without necessarily making this only applicable to the spiritual,a positive attitude will affect what will occur in our lives,this applies in detrimental way to that which is negative also.

Granted,the stresses and strains of life (whatever oppress us) prevents us from being able to find the time to be ‘alone with our thoughts ‘ If you will allow,will you listen to my further thoughts on the subject?

If we were to to find the time,it seems that the time is ‘created’ by us alone.

We are ,as if you have not already guessed,the creators of our own desires.It may be positive,it may be negative,but we are all in control of our own destiny ,and by using that same line of thought as a base point,moral issues are ours alone (as individuals) to be wholly responsible and accountable for.

This of course is all information that has been known of for countless years,yet what my reasons for mentioning these points is as follows :

It does seem quite plain to many,that the path which benifits us (and so others) is in our power to decide upon.

We may not be able,due to our personal circumstances,to ‘walk’ That path immediately,but plans can be laid to attain that which we desire.

V.

Is it possible to achieve our dreams? If I were to be in an innqocent frame of mind,I would say ‘of course’,but is that true when we examine the matter in question in an intellectual frame of mind?

If that factor were to be introduced,should we surely see the falasy of that we were to be presented with?

If we were to examine the false information and arrive at a final conclusion for ourselves,would that not be a far more satisfactory result?

The use of the intellect shall free us,granted,yet in order for that to be used to its utmost usefulness,we should be aware of that fact to make full progress and furtherance in a positive way as regards any situation we are presented with in our lives.

It takes consideration of how life affects us . If we merely carry on so to placate others for what is good for them only and for ourselves there is no good to be found,is that really going to cause us anything but misery?

True ,there is much merit for generosity towards others (even if it is not us who benefits)

but there has to be a point when we draw the line.There has to come a point when we make time for ourselves,in other words.

Every one of a caring nature,by the rules of cause and effect,will attract positive energy,that is true enough,but that is not the point I am making.

To be seen to agree with another’s behaviour,conduct,beliefs,ect. when in fact we cannot,we merely ‘agree’ with them,is not to do ourselves an injustice,but another as well (they may be a party,group,ect.,not necessarily an individual)

and in fact they may respect us as people if we are honest about how we feel about whatsoever issue is raised.

~

Someone said to me the other day a statement that I did not agree with,but I said nothing,why did I do so?

I chose not to,all I can think is that it was an (on my part) attempt to make another actually think for themselves,as opposed to ‘obeying’ that which society approves of.

Even if I had not ,for arguments sake,done so in that case,Is it even In the realms of that which is wrong,to make another (a shock tactic,if you like) make decisions (and be aware of those decisions) to decide for themselves how to better their lives?

Of course it is not,I hear you say,yet why are so many people stuck in this rut,this rut that they shall remain in as long as they choose not to acknowledge that which their subconscious is fully aware of.

But is that truly subconscious?Or is that just merely an excuse for not (out of ignorance) admitting that to ourselves,and so by doing so we shall put ourselves with what what we fear the most.

‘What is it ?’ – You may ask.

All of us ,even those who are ignorant,of not being accepted for our individual perspective on life.

True,some much less than others,but even they cannot deny,I expect they do so more than others,I wish to refer to those who do not study or think deeply about life in general also,they do say ‘ignorance is bliss ‘ ,that is true enough to some extent,but only those who wilfully comply to ‘how they should be’ do not wish to progress their intellectual viewpoint.

The world in general compartmentalizes us all into ‘groups’ That they deem as ‘correct’ for us to be in.

It takes someone who is aware of the facts (their social standing is irrelevant) to appreciate what is going on in the world around us,and that which affects them [as individuals]personally also.

VI.

Is it possible to run out of things to say?Of course not,you may say,and you would be correct in saying so.

The human mind (the higher side of our intellect,if you like)is always thinking and contemplating what our next move should be,how we can tackle the latest problem,ect.

So in answer to the question that began this chapter,it is not possible (as you expected me to say.) What I truly do mean is not only limited to that which is vocalized but considers the thought process also.

The way that all of us (I know I do) seem to have ‘conversations’ in our head- in short we seem to hide
that which we truly feel.

It might be a brain injury issue (in my case,but that is separate from what I am writing)

My earlier statement was somewhere between a guess and a question,does the same situation occur ?

By which I mean,does the occurrence happen to the the same degree? -That there is my question,my friends.

That brings to light a point that I have never fully explored,it would have to be with another,as I would have a real viewpoint to work with.

But it begs the question ,is that possible to ascertain?

It is one thing to say ‘I know how you feel’ but is it not truly another to understand the difference [in the truest sense] in the other?

That may sound vague (I hope only to some) so,if I can,it is my wish to cast more light upon the subject .

I am sure the vast majority (in fact I think all are capable ) understand and see the underlying framework of what I was getting at ,but am I right in saying so ?

That is where my point enters.

The point is this : if it not possible to see through another’s eyes, perception and so forth,how is it possible to make such a claim?

The answer (as far as I see it ) is obvious,it is not. That shall lead me nicely into another comment on life in general.

That which I have related to you in the last two ‘stanzas’,was just intended to make the reader think about the situation in question . I hope that it did so,for it is my wish to make others think for themselves [independantly]

It is most valid and unique,that a singular thought presents itself to the to the ‘page’ (in whatsoever form seems relevant) and so by which many thoughts are formed.

So many thoughts are lost in the ‘vacuous ‘ stream of unending ‘chatter ‘ within the mind.

It is seemingly mundane,yet if one were to stop and analyse,many a great thing would be discovered.

The greatest discoveries are those which are not thought about,they seem to ‘appear’ to the individuals mind.

May I reiterate a point I have already highlighted,the greatest of all that is most profound is hidden away,as the musicical genius Prince once said ‘all that glitters ain’t gold.’

VII.
The blankness of a stare looks far deeper than can be seen by outward appearance alone.

I may have said (or something like that before) but I guess that shows how much I feel that this should be reinforced.

Let me clarify how I began,please read on:

It may seem that another may have ‘nothing inside’ worthy of listening to,when in fact that is far from the case.

A not too clear beginning to this chapter was made that way for a reason,

By use of analogy,how many times have all of us misjudged another?

When in fact when someone who we did not think (in a respectful way or not) to have that high an intellect ,astounds us with their profundity and intelligence.

We may return again to examine this point,but think ,on this I ask,what is most important to one individual may not seem so for another.

I am sure I have already done so,in fact I am certain,I have no wish to imply that I know more than others,but does that not highlight the point I am making?

If that is at all unclear allow me to explain further.

If an individual simply wants to view the world superficially,as opposed to examining life,their intellectual gain is of no great import,whereas one who takes the time to analyse life is in a far greater position in life than those who ascribe to the fact that monetary gain ,fame ,ect.are so much higher qualities.

Almost like a summary,if everyone were to adopt an honest internal monologue with oneself(or a dialogue with another) what was thought mundane shall flourish into a far higher plane of the intellect which may be realized,as opposed to the fact that was not thought of as possible before.

On a similar note (my point may seem exhausted) ,and that,I must stress, is indeed the point that I wish to bring to the readers attention.

Life seems (to the innocent) to have many complexities,when in fact the realization that we are all fundementaly the same (social factors,other interventions are merely nothing).

What I am getting at ,to use a well used Cliche,is that we all begin as a blank canvas,

pure and innocent,if you like.

As before with another point that I mentioned,many have commented on this situation,

but social factors ,external influences ‘moulded’ who we are as a person.

True,as many would say,there is a part of,us (once we have reached consciousness) that will react to how we respond under certain circumstances,but is that simply it?

In my opinion,not at all.

I seem to vaguely remember something,or perhaps this is my own thought,we are ‘prepared’ in a neurological way ,in the womb,so if I am right (I am not saying I am or am not,by the way) our unique individual consciousness is begun there,life experience(s) take over from there.

As stated above who we naturally are dictates who we shall become.

True ,traumatic events may have a very severe impact on our lives,but who we truly are shall always remain.